fallingallovertheworld asked: About two weeks ago I went out on a first date with a guy. The date went really well (he took me out to dinner). We had some good conversations and laughed a lot and he asked me if I wanted to go out again the next weekend. He even casually referred to me as his girlfriend in a conversation, which took me by surprise to be honest, but I was fine with it. AND later I heard from a mutual friend that he was talking about what a great time we had and how he really likes me. So I know the feeling is mutual. Problem is… we haven't really spoken to each other at all since the date. I walked with him after class the other day, trying to make conversation, but he got all awkward and wouldn’t keep the conversation flowing at all, and eventually started talking to someone else and walked away without saying goodbye. He hasn’t tried to initiate anything with me since the date, so I’ve made a few efforts to talk to him, but he just kind of leaves me hanging. So now I’m just confused. He’s been talking to his friends/other people about how much he likes me and wants to date me, he called me his girlfriend to my face, was totally casual/non-awkward on our date, and straight up asked me to go out again (though no official plans were made), but for some reason he won’t talk to me now. My friends have said he’s probably just really nervous, being his first relationship and all (we’re both 17 btw), but how can I get him to… get over it? It’s frustrating because I DO like him, and I know he likes me, but he clams up and gets all nervous now, which is dumb because we used to talk all the time before we started “dating.” I know I need to talk to him to clear up the situation, but my last few face-to-face attempts have failed, he’s awful at texting, and I feel like a facebook message is kind of immature…but what do you suggest I do to ease the tension and figure out what his deal is?
Try and set up another date and if he blows you off then I think you’re just going to have to bite the bullet and talk to him. It’s going to be awkward but it’ll be okay, it’s better than wondering. You may need to pull him aside say something along the lines of “hey I really like you and I thought you really liked me but I’m just kind of confused. I feel like you’ve been kind of blowing me off whenever I see you at school. If you don’t want to date me or you want to go slow that’s cool I am just confused. I am not use to dating either so I don’t really know if I’m doing this right or not” remind him that he doesn’t need to be nervous around you because you like him and you’re just as nervous as he is. Even if you aren’t *that* nervous it might be nice to say you are so he feels a little better. Also there is no “right” way to date, however if he is blowing you off consistently I would say he isn’t worth your tears. If he doesn’t want to date and you were friend before I would try and see if you can at least go back to being friends, sometimes that doesn’t always work but you should always try.